Won’t you be my wingman?

Networking can be intimidating and even scary to someone uncomfortable in an unfamiliar situation with unfamiliar people. This kind of situation is exhilarating for others and presents a fun challenge to make new friends. If you are the kind of person who is uncomfortable walking into a room with people you don’t know, you are not alone! According to the 2010 Census, about 16.8% of our population fears meeting new people. That is 39.4 million people who self-reported that they have this fear!

Networking when you’re anxious

If you are one of the 39.4 million, you likely avoid networking meetings or attend only the ones where you know people. Maybe you’re the person who sits in the corner and waits for people to approach you. You might be the one who visits with only one person the entire time, stalling until the event ends. If so, you can put your fears to rest, and I have an excellent solution for you to get the most out of your networking experience while having the comfort of a trusted friend. Bring your own wingman!

The wingman concept for networking

A wingman is typically referred to as the pilot of a secondary aircraft providing support or protection to a primary aircraft in a dangerous situation. In a networking situation, this is a friend or co-worker who attends the event with you. Walking into the event with a friend will help calm your anxious feelings. It could also double the amount of people you will interact with at the event.

How so? When you attend with a friend, they will likely know people you don’t know. The advantage of going with a partner is that they can introduce you to someone they know. In turn, you can introduce them to someone you know. Those conversations then lead to discussions with other people. You keep moving through the room together.

At some point, you separate to cover more ground. Toward the end of the event, you merge your conversations as people start to leave. This makes the once-dreaded networking event tolerable or even, dare I say, fun and, most importantly, an effective use of your time!

The importance of planning ahead

The key to making this a success is having a game plan for the event. A couple of years ago, I acted as a wingman for a new employee who was reluctant about the networking process. We attended an event together, but I didn’t prep him with my strategy before the event. When we got there, I introduced him to someone I knew. I left him with his conversation and moved on to another conversation.

He didn’t know this was intentional and felt abandoned! After that, he followed me around the room. He was still able to meet some people, but it wasn’t as many as I had intended. Worst of all, he still felt uncomfortable attending networking events, and I failed at my mission.

My takeaway from that experience was to have a plan going into each event and share it with the person I’m attending the event with. I can’t expect my employees or anyone else to know my plan and execute it if I don’t share it with them!

Having a wingman to attend networking events with you is an effective strategy for meeting more people. When you are comfortable and confident, it shows and will be attractive to others. Give it a try, and invite a work friend to be your wingman for your next networking event. Let me know how it went for you!